Sunday.

I want this so much.

There are so many reasons why this should not or could not happen.

I tell myself I will not let this happen.

I wont laugh, smile, touch, give you any idea that this is an option.

But then I see you, and like ice cream in the sun, I am a puddle.

Laying melted on the floor

I touch your strong arm, laugh at your jokes, smile with both my mouth and eyes.

I am a goner.

Abandonment.

I miss you.

But I had to stop answering.

I hope you understand.

This isn’t about what I want.

Cause god, I want you.

This is about whats best for us in the long run.

I was never going to be your girl.

You were never going to leave her.

It’s hard to get your messages,

To see your face and look away.

But loving you means destroying myself.

And I just can’t do that again.